Poultry Flavored Toothpaste

Meet my little girl, Napoleon. She's partly feral and came home as a 9-day old that was being nursed by a stressed out dachshund. She grew up to the sounds of violently dying ninjas and mutated monsters of Ninjagaiden, the sounds of spells being cast by Moonkins and Death Knights, the wonderful and absolutely classy commentary of Sir David Attenborough on the astounding features of our planet and the life on it, and lastly, the sound of her benefactors' guitars and vocal jamming. Given a glimpse of the kind of sound and sights that formed the input for her mental models of the world, she is an amazing ninja warrior who will protect herself and her misguided benefactors against all intruders that enter the home base. Always putting herself at the head of such risks, she bravely goes forth to meet the enemy. (If she had pants, she would pee them but still make it to the front lines of this recurring battle)
She is now five and recently discovered toothpaste. It is the thrilling end to her day to ingest this wonderful pasty, poultry-flavored delicacy. However, she will have none of that brushing-her-teeth nonsense. That is reserved solely for humans who spend inexplicable amounts of time in front of the silvered glass doing odd things such as inserting string between their teeth and pulling it out when the sole purpose of string is to be chewed and swallowed! She's receives this dessert on a baby toothbrush which she chews on in order to reach the gaps where the paste sneaks into. And I twist and turn the brush to allow her to relish it at different angles. *muhuhaha* And this is how she looks at me while her adorable little face scrunches up in focus and happiness and the slightest hint of spazzing out from the deliciousness of it all.